Relatives and friends

Butterfly89

'Thank you' to you all for your support ?⚘

I would like to say a MASSIVE thankyou to all you lovely lot who helped to advise me and support me whilst my Dad was dying. This is by far the BEST site I have come across where everybody is so friendly and seem like they genuinely care. You all really helped me to keep strong when I was losing one of the most important people in my life. So once again a MASSIVE thank you to you all and I will forever be grateful for such kindness.

It has been just over 6 weeks since my lovely Dad passed away from cancer. And although it feels like it has gone fast...it has still only been 6 weeks which is nothing. I cry for my Dad most days wishing he was here and trying to get my head around the fact I will never see him again...not in this lifetime anyways! It is by far the hardest thing I have ever had to face and I don't think I will ever truly forget what I witnessed over the months leading up to his death. So in time I may need some sort of councilling to help deal with everything. My mum is finding it extremely difficult and after losing so many people in her life she says this is the hardest and most painful loss of them all. I worry for her, but I'm trying my hardest to keep her spirits up even though I know it is still early days. I miss my Dad so much that no words can ever fully describe the extent of how much I miss him. I have even attempted to text him about something that I think he may like or find funny and I then remember he won't see the text and he won't ever reply to me again. That is the hardest part...remembering all the little things that made him who he was and realising there will never be another him again and that's when I realise what a massive hole I have now in my life that cannot ever be filled. I know in time it gets easier to deal with and that is comforting for me, however I just hope the same will apply for my mum.

I won't be on here very much anymore but I will return from time to time and hopefully I can help others on here when I am able to. I wish you all the best along your journeys! :x: :x: :x:

Baxter2

Sending lots of love and strength to you @Butterfly89. You're doing just fine and always remember the love and care you showed to both your parents during dads illness and passing. Inspirational! Take good care of yourself and mum K ????❤️

Meezermum

@Butterfly89 I was only wondering the other day how you are doing. It is hard to carry on sometimes and I'm not sure if it easier or we just accept things . I lost my dad at the same age as you but he is still remembered . You have been so strong for your Mum and don't forget to look after yourself . Take care and don't forget to enjoy the little things in life ???:x::x::x::x:

SuzyB

@Butterfly89 was thinking about you. When we lost my Mum, my Dad really struggled too. All I learned is to go with it and make time for yourself and don't feel guilty taking time for yourself! Sending love and hugs :x::x:

LABluebell

@Butterfly89 Sending you love and hugs for the times ahead. Your dad will be with you always. :x::x::x:

GD62

Hi @Butterfly89

Imparting best wishes and hugs to both you and your mum. You are coping very well and take time to remind yourself of the lovely memories you have of your dad, and the happy ones you will experience in the future.

Bug hugs :x::x::x:

Lizalou

Thinking of you and your mum @Butterfly, do let us know how you get on in the future. Sending love and prayers. :x::x:

Clancy

@Butterfly, lovely to hear from you, I was only thinking about you and your family the other day. Just take baby steps and be there for each other. Love and hugs.:x::x:

LynneW

You will always have your memories @Butterfly89, things will become less painful and even the awful memories will fade a little. It’s lovely that you have taken the time to contact the Forum, I agree its a wonderful site when you need some tender loving care, TLC, and advice.

Look after yourself and your mum, Best wishes and prayers,
Lynne :x::x::x:

sweetcheeks

Oh @Butterfly89 , sorry I've only just seen this , lovely to hear from you , Take care of yourself and off course your mum,
With lots of love and hugs
Tracey :x::x::x:

Butterfly89

@Baxter2 @Meezermum @SuzyB @LABluebell @GD1962 @Lizalou @Clancy @LynneW @sweetcheeks

Thank you all for your kind replies.
I haven't been on here for a while. I guess life was revolved around visiting cancer sites etc for over the past 2 years and all of a sudden it's come to an end. And it is time for me to focus on a different life than the one I've had for the past couple of years. I'm coping pretty well...or so I think I am. My mind refuses to deal with the fact my Dad has gone and I don't seem to be getting upset very much. I'm not sure if it's because I don't want to face the fact he's gone forever, or maybe I will grieve properly when I am ready or maybe I am actually coping...! I think of him constantly though and can often hear him in my head giving me his advice or his opinion on something and I smile. He's been gone 3 months now it's gone quite quick really. I do hope things get better for my Mum in time as she wakes up during the night nearly every night with flashbacks of what she witnessed in his final months. This time last year everything was oh so different...very sad really. Christmas will be different this year without my Dad sitting at the end of the table like he always did. I may even take a mince pie and leave it on his grave, he requested for one back in April but unfortunately they don't sell them that time of year, so he never got one!

:x::x::x:

sweetcheeks

@Butterfly89 its always both heartwarming and heartbreaking to read your posts, and yes this year lots of our lives are very different from that a year ago , none of us would choice to be here on this forum and for many of us it will continue to be a lifeline for as long as it is needed , but for you its time to move forward with your lives and make some happy memories , occasionally pop back and say hello , but most of all make each day count , much love sweetheart to you and your mum Tracey :x::x::x::x::x::x::x::x:

SuzyB

@Butterfly89 so lovely to hear from you. We are still watching and waiting with our Dad, but have to say that his poor body is definitely giving up. It's awful for your Mum but I'm sure with all the love and support that you have for each other things will become manageable. Funny word, manageable, but I know you will understand. The problem with this disease, you know what's coming so the mourning process starts before the end. Sending you love and hugs and hoping that this Christmas you will find some joy along the way. :x::x::x:

Trinity

@Butterfly89 good to hear from you, sending you love & peace for the Christmas season and beyond :x::x: