Going back to work...
My last few posts have been a bit of a downer and I think I need antidepressants again. I'm really struggling with the mental impact this is having... It's just mind bending! I can't stop thinking about it!!
Why am I so worried about it coming back or what the future holds I'm gonna drop dead at some point? I just wish I wasn't bothered by it and could enjoy stuff more. Everything feels so out of control and I'm doubting what I've been told...maybe they are keeping stuff from me. This probably all sounds so stupid!! The worst one is not 'why me' but what did I do wrong to give myself cancer!! I just fancy cracking open the wine and saying fuck it all and get really pissed!!?