Just Diagnosed

cant believe it

Totally shocked

This afternoon my husband had a colonoscopy the consultant said he found a tumour 3-4cm at the top of his rectum , the next stage is mri and ct scan .. I need something to hold onto is there a chance it may not be cancer he is only 44 ... feeling broken


Hi there, I can feel your pain as I was diagnosed aged 34 in February. There's always a chance it might not be cancer, but my doctor gave me a 99 % chance that it was when my tumour was found. You are in the hardest place now, the not knowing is so difficult and I do hope you don't have to wait too long for results. But, if it is bowel cancer it is very treatable, and by that I mean curable. Some of the people on this page have amazing stories, so try not to fear the worst.

This is a hard road to travel, but once you know what you are dealing with it will feel much more manageable. Deep breaths, you can get through this.

Sending positive thoughts,

Jodie :x::x:


Im so sorry you find yourself here but I promise this is the most supportive friendly forum regarding bowel cancer. I was diagnosed via colonoscopy on 28th dec 2017 aged 39. I had a 6cm recto stigmoyd tumour that started at the top of my rectum. I too hoped they were wrong but the dr was confident in what he had seen and handed me over to the colorectal nurses after colonoscopy. The results also with my ct and mri scans then went to mdt and i was given a plan, chemo radio( standard for rectal cancer) then surgery and then chemo, i had my surgery on the 30th may and im now recovering with a temporary stoma. I know initial diagnosis is horrendous and your mind races but until your ct and mri are done its a waiting game im afraid. Once they are done a team of professionals will put together a treatment plan. I promise once this is in place and your actively in treatment you will feel better, i know that your heads in pieces right now and you cant imagine ever feeling better again, but you will I promise. I really struggled upon diagnosis and googled till i made myself sick with fear! Try to stick to this site, i promise it will be the best decision you could make. Did the dr give a diagnosis? At my colonoscopy the dr said' ive found a large 6cm tumour im sorry it doesnt look good at all' he then said ' i would love to be proven wrong but im confident in what i saw' i then said i have a 6 year old and passed out. Please try to take one day at a time and contact the colorectal nurses they were a massive support to me in the early days. Sending hugs :x::x::x:


I was diagnosed in November 2017 at age 43 after a colonoscopy that revealed “a very ugly looking mass” around my rectum. I started chemoradiation in December, had surgery in May and like @kitti I am now with a temporary stoma. I just completed my first course of chemo and have another 7 rounds of that, once that’s done I will have surgery to reverse the stoma. We have all been where you are. The worry. The fear. The not knowing. Looking at your kids and your family and not knowing how much time you have left with them. And then you get your treatment plan. And life moves on with cancer in it and doing all the things you need to do to try and fight the beast. As @ch7091 has said, bowel cancer is treatable. And there are great stories on here that give you hope when you feel like you have none and strength and encouragement on the days you’re really struggling. Once I found this forum I stopped looking elsewhere.
Sending you positive vibes and blessings :x::x:


Hi @cant believe it and a very warm welcome to the forum from me too!

You've had great advice and support from the lovely forum users already and there's not really very much for me to add! Try to keep busy and distracted as you get yourselves through each day....it's probably the best way as the waiting for tests, scans and results is just horrendous! I would reiterate that this period of life in limbo is probably the worse as once you know what you're dealing with and have a treatment plan, you will feel better I'm certain!

Stick around and we'll all support you as best we can! I'm sure there will be others along very soon to say hello and share their experiences and knowledge.

Sending all my very best wishes,



Hi @cant believe it. I am in exactly the same position as you and your husband at the moment. Had a colonoscopy on 26th June 2018 where the consultant found a 3-4 cm lesion at the top of my rectum, biopsies taken. He said it was highly suspicious and was certain it was cancer so I’ve had my ct, my mri is today and my MDT meeting should be on Monday. Then I’ll have my definite diagnosis and a treatment plan. I still can’t quite believe it’s happening because I feel so well! Everyone here has been so supportive and encouraging and some of the stories are really amazing. The waiting is definitely the worst but as my friend said to me last night (who was diagnosed with breast cancer last year)...your plan will set you free! So my tips for now are...get a diary, write everything down, keep busy but talk about it those that are close to you (or even those that aren’t if it helps! Stay positive and use this forum to get your information. Don’t use Dr Google! Sending warm wishes to you both :x::x::x:


Sorry to read your news @cant believe it but as said before we have all been there and reiterate other advice. Hugs and positive healing :x:


Hi @cant believe it - the best piece of advice I was given was, as well as writing down all your questions beforehand, is to record all the sessions and telephone calls with the Drs, surgeon, oncologist nurses etc. I downloaded an App AudioMemos to my iPad and iPhone (cost 99p) and the medicos are quite happy for you to record them, for as my oncologist said, it saves him having to repeat everything, and at the Brighton Cancer Clinic they will even record and cut a disk for you if you want.
The waiting game is the worst part of this C-journey!
Best wishes


@cant believe it , I was in your shoes 14 months ago when my husbands screening comeback abnormal , feel free to read through my profile, I was in a state of shock , couldn’t believe my healthy looking and feeling husband had rectal cancer, take a day at a time , once you have a plan in place you will quickly adjust to a new normal , good luck and lots of love :x::x::x:


Hi@cant believe it, hope you get positive news and if it is confirmed then hopefully your team will have a good plan in place :x::x:


I’m sorry to hear of your husbands shocking nes. I know it’s hard I was told I had a very line mass in my Rectum in March at the age of 41. I have finished 25 fractions of chemo radiation in May. I am awaiting an APRoperatipn on the 16th of July to leave me with a permanent Stoma. Pleased keep your spirits up and dont despair. Treatment is fantastic these days. We are always here for you. Take care.


Sorry you find yourself here @cant believe it Bowel cancer is quite frankly sh*t!! I was diagnosed last April with stage 3 at 35 years old. I'd been going to the doctor for years previous to be told I was too young and not a man it's not bowel cancer, I just had piles and anxiety!! Wrong!!
In this situation you can't not worry but there are bits and bobs you can look at like diet that help you feel more in control. As everyone says, try not to Google and remember that bowel is treatable. If it is cancer they will do everything to get him back on his feet.
I've just had my 6 month scan and it was clear. I'm out of the woods by any means but there are lots and lots of positive stories here and we are here to support you. :x: :x: :x:


Sending every good wish & healing vibes. I hv only v recently joined this forum & can confirm it is abs amazing, informative & supportive, so welcome.
I’m defo feeling better for now hving a plan & starting on treatment; hope u will soon get a plan & will then feel more in control of the horrible situation :x:


Hi @can't believe it
Just finished chemo for me was not bad at all diagnosed with stage 3 bowel cancer in late January with colonoscopy had op removed tumour along with 24 nodes 5 showed we're cancerous hence chemo into see oncologists last Thursday very happy with me go in for checks in six month's time stay positive I know it's hard but I never doubted docs who were marvellous


Hi @cant believe it , sorry you find yourself here but welcome anyway, we’re a good bunch and there’s plenty of us to help and support you. I was diagnosed with a 4.4 cm sigmoid/rectal tumour back in August 2016. I knew I’d had something for a while and the doctor performing the colonoscopy at the time of diagnosis said ‘you’ve had this for some time’ which obviously freaked me out. If it helps, please read my profile, there’s a timeline of events which might make your journey a little clearer. Good luck and keep us in the picture :x::x:


Hi @cant believe it I am so sorry you have had this news. I was in a similar position in 2013 when My hubby and I were told he had a tumour in his rectum. Hit me like a freight train. This time of waiting for scans etc is the pits as our minds naturally wander but hang in there as once you know the situation and plans it does get easier. This was said to us by Andys Specialist Nurse a couple of days after the colonoscopy and it was so true. Sending u a bit hug in this difficult time :x::x:


Hi there you have lots of great replies on here, we all feel for you and I think the stage from having the colonoscopy results to getting past scans and to a treatment plan was the hardest time in my life. Like people say once you have a plan it feels better. We asked not to have a prognosis (My partner is stage 4 inoperable with Mets to. liver and abdominal area) we knew once we heard that that it didn't look promising but people have their own journey in this and for us we do think a prognosis which people often prove wrong is not helpful...(and googling is dangerous) I found the Macmillan website helpful and. the phone line even just to cry and unburden my fears. And this forum...

Meanwhile my partner is trying to stay in control of what he can e.g. No sugar, taking supplements alternative therapies, he found out exercise helps fight fatigue (for him) so does that when he can and after taking time off with the initial shock and. getting used to chemo he is now back at work part time.

He asked for a portacath rather than picc line so he. can swim which has really helped him keep his sanity esp in this weather. There was a wait for it but not too long.

I also get a lot out of the counselling sessions, he does too i really would recommend counselling (we go separately) if ur interested sign up asap as. the wait can be long..

Wishing you all the very best, lots of people have success stories despite bleak initial diagnosis - they're great for inspiration.⭐


Hi @jandals

I just noticed your husbands diagnosis is the same as mine was. Although I was diagnosed as stage 3 initially, my first lot of adjuvant chemo didn't work and I progressed to stage 4 with mets to liver and peritoneum. I just wanted to offer you both lots of hope and positivity with the current diagnosis. I had pretty major surgery and although I'm on chemo indefinitely, I'm doing very well on the whole! Please feel free to read my profile for further info.

Sending you both loads of good wishes,



Thanks so much! I've sent you a pm

cant believe it

I have just seen all these lovely messages made me cry ( but in a nice way) all the positive comments.
It’s 7 days on and still no news it is so hard can’t believe we got past these 7 days.
Thank you everyone for taking the time to reply :x::x::x::x::x: