Stage 4 bowel cancer


Update of our rollercoaster journey

Hi all

Sorry not updated for a while as so much has been going on.

On the good news front, Andy took me on a picnic at the end of July and surprised me with a proposal! He had planned it all, with help of friends had set up a teepee, candles, etc, and he looked so excited and happy, it was amazing. We booked and planned our whole wedding in 10 weeks and with covid and Andy’s illness, there were so many times we thought the wedding would never happen. Thankfully, it did and we had an absolutely amazing day with our closest family and friends. The weather was kind to us and we got married outside in a beautiful venue. It was truly magical and Andy was well enough to enjoy it and coped really well.

He had a CT scan at the end of August after six cycles of Folfiri and we did not get results until 22 September due to his oncologist being on maternity leave, the locum then walking out without any notice, it was a complete shambles. After MDT we were told they felt it was stable in all areas, not shrunk but not grown either. We felt this was a positive sign chemo was at least keeping it under control for now.

On the bad news front, a few days after the scan results and two weeks before the wedding, Andy came home from work shivering and with abdominal pain. A couple of hours later he was virtually unresponsive and ended up being blue lighted to hospital with sepsis. Very frightening experience. It was felt this stemmed from his kidney as tumour was pressing on kidney 😪 Thankfully they got the sepsis under control quickly and he ended up having kidney stents six days before the wedding.

Four days before the wedding we had an oncology appt when we were told that despite having told us two weeks earlier than his CT scan was stable, they had reviewed it again in light of his kidney stents and now felt it actually showed progression and that the Folfiri wasn’t working. 😭We were totally devastated and distraught, having previously been told it was stable. It was the hardest thing we ever did but we decided not to tell anyone before the wedding as we wanted it to be a happy day of celebration. He was offered Lonsurf but we were not keen for that so opted instead Folfox, which he had for six months in 2019 after his initial bowel surgery, plus privately funded Avastin, which we finally managed to ascertain would cost £455 per cycle. We also sought a private second opinion as to other treatment options.

Three days after the wedding he then had bad abdominal pain during his 9th Folfiri so it had to be stopped midway and he was admitted for a couple of days.

We have been chasing for new chemo to start ASAP and first one is finally scheduled for next week. Sadly in the last couple of weeks, Andy’s health has deteriorated greatly. He began struggling with eating, feeling very bloated and then began being sick. As a result, he has become so very painfully thin and weak. We have had to sit down with our children and have the conversation no parent ever wants to have. So heartbreaking 😭😭😭

He had pre chemo yesterday and they could see how poorly he is. They took his bloods and we were called in evening to say he had very low sodium and high creative and needed admission.

He is now back in hospital but is still being sick and looks so unwell. It is looking very unlikely he will be considered fit enough to have his chemo next week. It is absolutely heartbreaking to see how much he has deteriorated since our amazing wedding just over three weeks ago and I fear he is now too unwell for further treatment 😪. We are praying for a miracle. It is just so, so sad to watch him deteriorate so rapidly.


thinking of you and Andy @pinkflamingo, it's good you're together at home :x::x:


@pinkflamingo I hope you remain without symptoms, so pleased your home together, take special care :x::x:


Very pleased to read your update that Andy is at home @pinkflamingo (and that you remain Covid symptom free)
Thinking of you and sending lots of love :x::x::x:


Thinking of you @pinkflamingo, each and every day. :x::x::x::x:


Hoping you are well set up and supported at home. Been thinking of you and Andy :x:


I am so glad he is home @pinkflamingo, thinking of you and your lovely family, sending you as much love and strength as I can ❤️ ❤️


So pleased for you @pinkflamingo that you have Andy at home. Hopefully you will either not get Covid or you will be asymptomatic :x::x:


Thank you @Jane39 @cyclingjohnny @Lucy118 @Poppies @kathyS @Frances Styles @Lirio345 @Siona @mollytome @bettebette @Gypsy @waiteh @charleyb @acrorat for your kind comments.

Thankfully still no covid symptoms for either of us and we are at 14 days so isolation at an end now.

Andy has deteriorated further over the last few days 😪😪 Family and our children hopefully coming later today to see him, as not been able to before now due to the 14 day covid isolation period. It is all so very sad, my heart is breaking 💔😪😪


So sorry things are changing so fast. You are doing just great. You have got this and you can do it.
I hope you can find joy in the family visits and take time to have a moment for yourself. Know that we are all thinking of you and cheering you both on. :x::x::x:


Oh no @pinkflamingo, I'm so sorry to hear things are becoming more difficult. I'm pleased that the family can now all hoping you both though and hope this brings comfort to you all. Precious times ahead.

Sending so much love to you, Andy and all the family.

Karen 💚💙❤️💜💛


@pinkflamingo thinking of Andy yourself and children today while you are together. Hope you are comforted by the family around you all. Sending love & prayers for feelings of peace Kxx❤️🙏🙏❤️


Dear @pinkflamingo , all I can do or say is that I'm thinking of you, Andy and all the family. In my prayers too. Love Gypsyxxxx


@pinkflamingo such hard and difficult times for you all, but I’m so glad you got him home back with you Covid free .
I hope you find strength in being together with all your love for each other will be the felt by each and every one of will be in my prayers, big gentle hug for you all :x::x::x:


Dear @pinkflamingo very sorry to read your update. I am glad to hear that the family are able to come to visit now and I hope you and Andy find some strength and comfort in their visits. Thinking of you. With love :x::x:


Thinking of you and Andy and all your family. Sending lots of hugs and love,
Jane :x::x::x:


Dear @pinkflamingo so sad to read your update, my heart breaks for you.

Thinking of you and keeping you and Andy in my prayers Px


Dear @pinkflamingo love and strength you will find from having your family around you, hold them close. Thinking of you, gentle hugs lovely :x::x:


So sad to read your news. This is a terrible disease! My thoughts are with you and your family :x::x::x:


So very sad to read your update @pinkflamingo. I’m glad your family are now able to visit. Sending lots of love, hugs and strength and you’re in my prayers. :x::x::x::x:


Big virtual hugs to you @pinkflamingo :x::x::x: