Just diagnosed

If you've recently been diagnosed with bowel cancer, our website has lots of information to help you understand more and get the support you need.

goody

My husband has bowel cancer

Feeling very lonely as my husband is a changed person on Chemotherapy! So difficult as I am not used to him being so unpleasant and nasty and bad tempered.

Lirio345

Good evening @goody, welcome to the forum although I am sorry to hear about your husband’s diagnosis.

Unfortunately, chemotherapy, which can exert a huge physical strain on the body can also be accompanied by significant emotional changes. I would recommend in the first instance that you request to join our closed caregiver group where you will be able to share your feelings openly with other partners, relatives and caregivers (see caregivers - listed under topics).

As I am a patient my experience of this is different, but I do think that your husband might benefit from some emotional support. Can you talk to him about this change in his personality. Alternatively it might be an idea to approach your GP to see what help is available. Please let us know how you get on, Kim :x::x:

goody

Thank you so much really appreciate that will do Goodyxx

freyaburmesejanet

Goodness @goody ! You could be me, describing mine on days 1 -3. On day 4 he was much better. This was his first cycle so wonder if it will happen each time. Would love to chat on the caregiver group. Many many hugs. :x::x::x:

Tiffany

@goody

Hi there and welcome. My hubby was diagnosed in June 2015 and I have been active on here for many years. Please feel free to PM me anytime or as Kim suggests above request to join Caregiver Support (bottom topic on left hand side of page) to you can chat to other husbands, wives etc away from patients. It's a great group where you can say what you want freely without fear of upsetting anyone. We have all been there and understand how hard it is.
Sending love, Tiffany :x:

goody

Hi thanks for your support!

Quote from @freyaburmesejanet:
Goodness @goody ! You could be me, describing mine on days 1 -3. On day 4 he was much better. This was his first cycle so wonder if it will happen each time. Would love to chat on the caregiver group. Many many hugs.

Mark McC

Hi @goody

The first 3 days of each of my chemo cycles I was on steroids so suffered with insomnia. There was constant lethargy whilst I was in the ‘2 weeks on’ part of the cycle, lots of headaches, and unsettled stomach. My particular drugs also led to pins and needles in my fingers and toes and during later cycles sore forearm for days after the infusion. All in all it made me irritable and short tempered on occasion no matter how hard I tried. I was lucky that my wife was a nurse so had a good appreciation of what I was going through but I made sure I kept telling her what was going on with me physically and mentally, cos even with people around and support I still felt alone and scared. Has he explained to you how the chemo is making him feel ?

stevejl

Hi @goody so sorry to hear what you are both going through.
I am a very laid back person with high tolerance levels but even I found the chemo made me less understanding, short tempered on occasions without warning.This then made me feel guilty which again made it worse as my family were not used to this new me.
What made it worse was the without warning as I could be faced with the same situation more than once & be perfectly nice then next time react completely differently there was absolutely no logic to it but I think the fatigue & tiredness from the chemo did not help.
Like @Mark McC my wife is a nurse to with a good appreciation of the situation but even she wondered sometimes where has my husband gone ,but again I kept telling her what was going on with me mentally & physically.
I found it very frustrating which made it worse.
I am now finished chemo & almost back to my old self so all I can say is that underneath your old hubby is still there & will return once chemo is over.
take care
:x::x::x::x: