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Scrabble96

My lovely Dad has gone so I'm saying goodbye

Since my last post on 24th June, my 91-year-old Dad's health deteriorated rapidly. Our hospice outreach nurse (from Severn Hospice) was organising two weeks' respite care for us which my husband and I desperately needed. This was put in place a week ago on Thursday (21st July) for a care home 11 miles away (my local care home of choice not having any vacancies) and we were waiting for transport to be arranged.

My gut instinct told me that he probably didn't have long to go and I wanted him to stay at home with me, where he's been since the end of February, not miles away in a strange place that would take me 40 minutes to get to. The hospice outreach nurse swung into action and by the end of the day we had a hospital bed delivered and three-times-a-day Hospice-at-Home care. We'd already had a night-sitter for a week (a god-send as Dad couldn't get himself to the bathroom) and she stayed on for another week.

Dad was able to confirm to the on-call doctor (on their second out-of-hours visit for pain relief) that he didn't want to go to hospital but wanted to stay at home with me and his Respect form was changed to reflect this. By Saturday Dad was only taking in a few teaspoons of water and after that, nothing. He slept most of the time and didn't really open his eyes again. By now I was sitting with him most of the time during the day, holding his hand and stroking his forehead. On Sunday he started saying over and over 'I love you' and 'my precious'. He needed more pain relief and on Tuesday he was fitted with a syringe driver. He never spoke again and eventually died, peacefully and painlessly early yesterday morning.

I'm so glad I was with him.

Liz Blakelands

@Scrabble96 So sorry to hear of your Dad's passing but pleased that you were with him and his journey was peaceful. Take comfort knowing that your Dad knew by your actions how much you loved and cherished him. Sending hugs and love, Liz :x::x:

WelshWife

I’m so sorry to hear about your dad. Sending love :x::x::x:

Jannine

I’m so sorry for your loss @Scrabble96 your story echoes my late father, I was able to keep him at home with the help of mamcillan and hospice nurses. I was with him right to the very end and held his hand as he passed. It’s such a privilege to witness such a surreal and peaceful experience. It will bring you great comfort in time :x::x:

kathyS

@Scrabble96 so sorry for your loss and very happy that you trusted your instincts about your Dad and so pleased you were there for him at the end, is this not what we all want - to be with the people we love and have loved us when the time comes. Sending love as you grieve your loss 💓💓💓🙏🙏🙏

Ali

So sorry to hear about your loss but lovely that you were with him at the end. Sending you love

Ali :x::x:

Baxter2

@Scrabble96

Please accept my condolences following the loss of your lovely dad. I'm sure you and he will have had great comfort knowing he was comfortable and well cared for at home.

Sending love,

Karen 🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻

Lizsa

So sorry for your loss and sending my love :x::x::x:

lisa7

Im so sorry to hear about your dad. You were very good to him and he knew it. Take good care of yourself. May he rest in peace :x::x:

Yorky77

So sorry to read this. I am glad you were with him at the end. Sending you much love. Jen :x::x:

bettebette

Sending condolences on the loss of your dad @Scrabble96
I can tell by your posts what a beautiful relationship you had and you looked after your dad right to the end ❤ with love :x::x::x:

Jane39

@Scrabble96
I am so sorry to hear about your lovely dad.
You cared for him so well.
Sincere condolences,
Jane :x::x::x:

Scrabble96

Thank you all so very, very much.
:x::x::x::x::x:

Hismom

Condolences to you and your family on the loss of your lovely dad. Your posts have been a wealth of information, thank you for sharing your and his experiences. Your dad was lucky to have you. Take care during this stressful time.

Danielle

I’m very deeply sorry to hear the loss of your dad. I can’t imagine the difficulty of emotions your going through right now but he was lucky clearly lucky to have you. Wishing you love :x:

justturned50

Dear @Scrabble96 so sorry about your father. You have been through so much. Glad you were able to be together at the end. Take care :x::x:

kas52

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Gula

So sorry for your loss @Scrabble96. Take care :x::x::x:

Cathy13

So very sorry for your loss @Scrabble96 :x::x:

Siona

So sorry for your loss @Scrabble96 sending you lots of love :x::x: